Sex Talk 101

I know sex talk makes some of y’all uncomfortable, which actually may be the problem in some cases, but as I was sitting here going over more information to provide the masses with about sexual responsibility and protecting yourselves from HIV I realized that I hadn’t gotten to the important part…..SEX TALK.

I realized today that there are still a number of people who have sex without having any discussion first. Raise your hand if you sit down with the person you’re about to get naked with and ask them if they have been tested, when they have been tested, and how at risk they could possibly be. STOP LYING. Some of y’all are raising your hands for appearance sakes only.

Can somebody explain to me how you can ask a man/woman whether they like it doggy style and if you can turn on the camera but you get red faced and ashamed to ask if those red bumps on his penis are herpes? I really want to know. Women can look a man in his face and tell him that he’s not getting any ass unless he puts in some tongue action but don’t ask him if he’s ever had sex with another man before. I’m not understanding.

So yes, the general gist of this post (which I will keep short and sweet) is to always have a discussion with the person you’re turning your body over to. In a perfect world it would be two people in a monogamous and committed relationship and they would be open and honest with each other about their sexual health status. Even if it’s not though, ask the tough questions.

Ask your partner the last time they were tested.

Ask your partner what their results were.

Ask your partner what their risk status is. (If they tested negative 6 months ago but have been at risk within the last 3 then they need to get tested again)

Ask your partner if they have ever had sex while in prison.

Ask your partner if he has ever had sex with another man.

Ask your partner if they frequently engage in sex with professionals (hookers).

Ask your partner if they are currently or have been on drugs and how long ago it was.

Inspect your partner’s merchandise. You look a sweater at Macy’s over for imperfections….do the same with the person you’re about to have sex with.

Knowing what you are dealing with is the key to protecting yourself.

While I was at the clinic getting tested I spoke in depth with the counselor about the posts I am writing and she gave me tons of information. This is the newest thing on the wire right now.

STFree
Right now STFree is only in New York. The basic info on the organization is that you go there to be tested and sign a waiver to release your information. You then receive a Safe Sex License.

Taken from their site.

The Safe Sex License (SSL) is the card that gives its users instant access to their STD testing information. This is how it works:

* Member dials the toll free number on the back of the SSL
* Member enters their Membership number located on the front of the card
* Member enters their personal pin number

Members will then have four menu options

* Press 1 to hear detailed instructions on how to properly use of the SSL
* Press 2 to hear about the HIV window period and other important STD information
* Press 3 to hear members HIV and other STD testing history
* Press 4 to change password

The SSL allows its users to instantly and confidentially

* Prove to another individual their STD testing history
* Educate themselves and others on important up to date STD information
* Educate themselves and others on proper use of this new form of prevention
* Encourages other forms of STD prevention

Do you understand how important it is to know?

Thanks for visiting Diva (in Demand).  To change this standard text, you have to enter some information about your self in the Dashboard -> Users -> Your Profile box.