Have you ever noticed how many songs there are on the radio about leaving somebody behind? Your man doesn’t act right…leave him. You find somebody better…leave him.You get a flat tire…leave him and his AAA. I understand that these songs are meant to be inspiring and motivational and helpful in grieving a lost relationship. But let’s be serious. There is a grief in losing a relationship! Not only that but let me hip y’all to a well kept secret. It’s okay to want your relationship to work!!!!
I have plenty of friends who are quick to say to hell with your husband and pack all the pictures of him up. But only one has said to me “Diva it’s perfectly fine to want your marriage to work!” I think people forget that you made a commitment to this person for a reason…you fell in love with them. And it’s easy for them to quote all the R&B songs on the radio about leaving because they don’t carry those same emotions. Oh and when you do acknowledge that you want to stay or work on things then you’re branded as weak. Here’s a lesson to carry with you. You are only a disappointment to yourself so don’t give a damn about what your friends think. Make decisions that YOU can live with when YOU look YOURSELF in the mirror every morning. And if that means trying to work things out with your partner then go for it.
It’s okay to not listen to Keysha Cole sing about the fact that she should have cheated to show him what it felt like. It’s okay to not listen to Jennifer Hudson sing about leaving a man because she was disappointed in him. It’s okay TO listen to her sing about never leaving that man in Dreamgirls!
YOU’RE GONNA LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE MEEEEEEEEEEE!
A few weeks ago the girls asked me if I’d read Fifty Shades of Grey. I hadn’t. All I knew about it at the time is that it involved some eroticism and was being labeled as mommy porn. I didn’t see the big deal about a little spanking but TJ informed me that it was apparently a lot more than a little spanking. So I promised to use my free hour of reading at B&N on my nook to investigate further and report back. It took a few weeks because I was not about to abandon my quest to finish the High Heel Series by my beloved author Gemma Halliday, but I finally got around to it today. I didn’t read any other information because I wanted to approach it with an unbiased mind and after reading 6 chapters (mostly in the middle) and then doing some research I have come to the conclusion that y’all really need to loosen up and get the stick out ya hind parts!
Here’s the deal. There is nothing extraordinarily rare about this storyline or intriguing or fascinating (like an alien invasion would be). It’s sex. But in this country we are so conditioned to be uptight about sex that we lie to ourselves. You want to know why so many “mommies” are fascinated with this trilogy? Because deep down inside they want to be tied up and made to obey too but they’ve been programmed not to say that out loud. Most of us have been programmed to bury our true desires and fall in line with what’s acceptable. This book is popular because it turns people on.
How did I come to that conclusion? That must be it because the writing is subpar at best in my opinion. I finished my hour of reading and wondered if this was really a professional writer. It reminded me of something I would have found on an erotic website….not through a publishing company. But it was definitely erotic and I think that’s what has got so many people in a buzz.
Then again if more people stopped pretending to be sexual creatures then it wouldn’t be such an enigma to read about.
That’s my initial report…final report actually because I won’t be reading anymore. Not because of the BDSM….I’m good with to each her own. But the dialogue and writing style put me off completely. I’ve taken my one for the team on this one.
I keep dreaming of you at night
Not the new you…the old you
The old you would hold me
Feeling you like I’ve never felt before
I don’t dream of you over there doing you
When you could be over here doing me
Every night the soft clouds of my sheets enclose me into bliss and luxury against my skin
And I remember feeling you against my skin
Along my neck
Across my lips
Down my spine
Between my legs
In the soft sheets I dream about your sweat dripping down on my skin
I used to inhale your vapors
Swallowing the drug
Being without you is the feeling of being addicted
Wanting that first orgasmic high
Feeling your heat
Chasing and chasing
Chasing the high of you
One night last week I read a post from a bipolar blogger friend and she was in the pit. Her plan was to take enough medicine to block everything out and hopefully when she woke up the next morning the monster would be gone. That sounded like a pretty good idea to me so I decided to try it. At some point I lost count of how many I’d taken but as time passed I got sleepier and sleepier and figured it was working. When I woke up I was still in hell. I think I should have taken more to accomplish my goal.
I want to make some cupcakes but when I get home I don’t have the desire to do the work right now. I had a great idea for my sorority sisters but again….I don’t have the desire to go through the process of making up a bunch of cupcakes just to take pictures of and post on Facebook hoping for orders.
I was thinking about sex the other day….great sex, not just a good release but a soul stirring, eye contact, perfect fit experience. I suppose that’s the emotional definition of “making love.” One day, over drinks, I’ll reminisce out loud about that last great time. You know what….the last great time was my last first time. Just amazing…but anyway.
Speaking of feelings….I showed TJ a picture of a woman and the proper response would have included the words “skank” and “whore”. Instead she said “oh she’s pretty”.
She doesn’t love me.
I had a job interview yesterday that was exciting. Of course the ones I get excited about are the ones I don’t get. Ya know…I asked myself this morning how many of the jobs I didn’t get last year were because I was unemployed. It takes a special kind of rat bastard to say “we only want to hire someone who is already working”.
I made a big pot of gumbo this weekend. It wasn’t my best because my roux was sub par due to my cheap ass pot. In additioin to that I let somebody convince me to try a new type/brand of sausage. I won’t do that again either. But instead of a whole chicken I used only thighs and they had a lot more flavor than breasts do. Very yummy. AND YES THERE WAS PAPRIKA IN IT DAMMIT!
TJ and I have been watching Oprah’s Life Classes. That episode with Iyanla about letting go of the anger saved a chick from getting cursed out last week. You know that you push my buttons and whether you do it out of amusement or call yourself being above that now…..Oprah and Iyanla saved your feelings last week. Four years ago when I was 30 I would have toasted your ass and then called your job and sent your boss a screen shot of their IP address so he would know you were blog stalking me from work. But I thought about the fact that I’m almost 35 and I’m a different person now. But TRUST that I’ve blocked your IP addresses and would appreciate it kindly if you’d refrain from commenting on my site because I could give less than half a damn what you think or have to say. Thank you and good night.